Every now and then, I stop and wonder : am I living the life that lights me up? Am I living the life that reflects the majesty of who I know myself to be capable of being? Am I moving through my days in a way that honors the potential of who I already am? And perhaps the biggest of them all : if I am indeed the godforce in expression in a physical world, how does this godforce choose to live?
In those moments, I stop…and take a moment to consider the following questions – not like this is a complete list but more as a way of getting my own attention! It is so easy to fall into a rhythm of repetition, even when to others that repetition may appear immensely different from the habits of their own lives. They are habits, nonetheless.
Am I awake?! Or am I living from the deep coma of habituation and mindless repetition?
I take a moment and I sit quietly….taking a few long, slow, deep Water breaths…and I let these questions wash through my body. Like the Meta Model III questions, these are not for me to answer but much more for my body to ‘digest’. All I have to do is keep my breathing deep and easy, my belly soft and my body relaxed – and let my body do the rest ! That is, after all, what Quantum TLC is all about.
* Do I pause to mindfully respond to questions or do I just say what I always say?
(Is my life desigining me or am I desiging my life?)
* Do I often find myself holding my breath?
(on the inhale – bracing against; or on the exhale – surrendering/hopelessness)
* Does my mind race ahead of my body, focusing on where I’m going next rather than on where I am right now?
(past/future with no ‘now’ – so no connection to my body)
* Do I wish my life were different – and then do nothing to make it so?
(the limp lament of the ‘lost soul’ or ‘victim’)
* Am I frequently angry that others don’t see the world the way I do?
(in that moment, my holodeck reminds me of its presence!)
* Do I spend more time paying attention to what other people are doing than I do to what I’m doing with my life?
(external referencing)
* Do I feel safe in my world?
(at all levels – physical, financial, love, friends, value of work, value of presence, etc.)
Am I awake? It’s hard to tell unless I pay attention and ask.
Each of these becomes a thought that I focus on for a day. Not like an obligation or a command, but much more like an invitation – allowing the question to sit at the back of my mind and pop into my awareness as I move from one thing to the next in a busy day. The question becomes the context within which my day unfolds, making it possible for me to notice what might otherwise just slide silently into the file of ‘life passing me by’ that so rarely gets revisited.
I am a profoundly fortunate woman. I live a magical life in so many ways. My life IS about these questions, filled with others who are on a similar journey of discovery. My life unfolds, from one day to the next, with courageous and curious people who are willing to journey with me, carving out their own paths as I carve out mine. What incredible company I keep! And in this moment of deep gratitude for the life I live; and in this moment of great appreciation for and to all those who share this life with me, I am mindful: it is indeed, my holodeck. And I create it all.
Breathing is good….
Leave a Reply