Wow! Where have I been??? It feels as if space and time have compressed and I went to bed on August 29th and woke up on September 7th! How kool is that! Louise-Van-Winkle….
Looking back, it feels as if I’ve come through some kind of maze….have maneuvered myself through experiences and conversations and discoveries that churned and turned and twisted themselves in ways that were invitations for me to look much deeper into myself. I must say, I am delighted with what I’ve found.
I’ve been ‘doing this’ for a long time. More than 25 years of my life have been lived in pressing the edges of what I knew ‘myself’ to be. In those years, I’ve grown; have found new things and let go of old ones; have felt amazingly connected and terrifyingly alone. And through it all, I have become MORE than I ever imagined possible. The interesting part for me is that THAT was the process that took me where I needed to go. No good/bad; no right/wrong, just living and engaging and being….and becoming.
I’ve discovered that this ‘more’ does not need to take a long time, nor does it need to be a struggle. What it does seem to require and demand is that I be completely and (what some might call) brutally honest – with myself. No room in there to fool myself or tell myself the stories that I would like to have be true – about myself. Far more potent has been my willingness to allow myself to see what I know – deep inside, where I live – is the truth of who I am. Sometimes, I discover it to be beautiful. Other times, it feels ugly and nasty and cruel. And truth be told, it’s all me.
In the years that I’ve been experiencing, creating and living what has come to be known as the ‘WEL-Systems body of knowledge’, I am aware that some have found me to be a delight – and others have held me as the devil herself! Over the years, I’ve gotten hundreds of ‘love letters’ from those whose lives have been powerfully transformed and I’ve gotten a sprinkling of not-so-much-love letters from those whose lives have been equally powerfully touched…and held in check by their commitment to their own truth. Either way, I am grateful for each has been the invitation for me to see myself through the eyes of another. And yet…I wonder…in a holographic universe (which I hold to), is there ever really ‘another’?
When I look back on the last week or so, I have no idea where I’ve been and I am very clear of where I am. I AM. I AM all of it…the perceived good and the bad; the creation and the destruction; the expansion and the collapse. I AM the joys and the sorrows; the delights and the fears; the questions and the answers. In that moment of awareness of it all, there is nothing that I do not already know. The more important question becomes: am I both willing and able to live it? And am I both willing and able to live it FULLY?
Today, I am clear that the answer to that is a resounding, compelling, powerful, profoundly and deeply vibrating YES! Wherever my life leads me, and however it takes me there, I choose to go with the full measure of who I AM. And for me, there is nothing other worth investing my time, my thoughts, my energy or my life in.
Breathing is good….
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